Cheating happens when you start looking for what you don't have. Somewhere along the way, you will meet someone who will be more charming or sensitive than the one you're already with. more sexy. More thoughtful. Wealthier. Better in bed. And you will meet someone who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your partner ever did. Because no boyfriend/girlfriend is perfect. Because your husband/wife will only have 90 percent of what you're looking for.

So, cheating happens when you look for the missing 10 percent. Say your girlfriend is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty girl next-door who has a cheerleader laugh no matter what she says: I broke my arm yesterday, ha ha ha... Or because your girlfriend is a couch potato who is always in pajamas and smelling of garlic and cooking oil, you may fall for the CK-One-smelling colleague who comes to work in a sharp pinstripe blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt. Or because your boyfriend is the type who never shuts up even when you've tried using duct tape, your heart may skip a beat when you sit next to a brooding, mysterious Latino on the bus.

But wait... That's only 10 percent of what you don't have. Don't throw away the 90 percent that you already do! add to the 90 percent the 100 percent that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The many adjustments you have made to better understand each others little quirks and idiosyncrasies. The wealth of memories that you have accumulated as lovers. The old sparks that can always be rekindled by the walk on the beach, barefoot and underneath the stars.

Cheating happens when you start looking for what you don't have. But faithfulness happens when you start being thankful for what you already have.


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